[Short version]
Total Eclipse 2017: Ethereal. Surreal. Beautiful. Outstanding. Amazing. Awe-inspiring. Heavenly. Exciting. The experience cannot be fully captured with pictures, video, or even words. And it was not nearly long enough! Thinking about it makes me emotional...even more so that I may not ever see another total eclipse again! And more emotions at the thought of how much more majesty and heavenly wonders we may witness in eternity with God!
"The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Day after day they pour forth speech;
night after night they reveal knowledge.
They have no speech, they use no words;
no sound is heard from them.
Yet their voice goes out into all the earth,
their words to the ends of the world.
In the heavens God has pitched a tent for the sun.
It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber,
like a champion rejoicing to run his course.
It rises at one end of the heavens
and makes its circuit to the other;
nothing is deprived of its warmth." - Psalm 19:1-6
[Full Version]
We traveled from our home to my sister Tiffany's house in Tennessee (normally a 5-hour drive) in about 7 hours on Sunday, August 20, 2017 – the traffic was pretty thick most of the way, with some stop-and-go points along the way. We traveled back home from Tennessee in about 9 hours on the evening of Monday, August 21, 2017 – it was an exhausting, mostly bumper-to-bumper traffic the entire way until we got within about 40 minutes of home. We saw license plates from so many different states! If we were playing the license plate game, we would have rocked it! On the last leg of our journey on Sunday, we stopped for gas about 45 minutes away from my sister's house and there were people selling eclipse glasses for $10-15+! We got ours at Walmart for $1 about 3-4 weeks before the eclipse. It’s a good idea to be prepared!
We watched the eclipse from Tiffany’s house on the side of a mountain with a group of about 11 people and it was awesome! Tiffany read Psalm 19 – beautiful and fitting Scripture for this event! She did a demonstration of how an eclipse works using a big kickball and a small fist-sized ball. I love how when we’re with Tiffany, we experience things in “high definition” and/or with a new perspective! We took a group picture and then sweet Jasper went down for a nap around 1 p.m. just before the moon started to eclipse the sun. Everyone did a craft as well – Tiffany had black construction paper, chalk, and circular cardboard cutouts to trace around to make the moon on the paper. We whisked the white chalk away from the circle to make it look like the moon eclipsing the sun with the sun’s beautiful corona whisping around the moon.
We were all excited when we saw the first sign of the moon eclipsing the sun, and our anticipation built for the next hour and a half as we waited for the incomparable event – totality. We didn’t want to look too long, but we wanted to keep watching at the same time! We used solar eclipse glasses and an awesome obsidian rock disc (about ½” – ¾” thick) to view the eclipse. While we waited for totality, we busied ourselves with taking pictures of each other. We watched and took pictures of the crescent moon shapes of light on the ground created by crescented sun shining through the branches of trees and through straw hats on paper or our clothes. We tried different techniques for viewing the eclipse, such as through homemade eclipse viewing boxes (empty cereal and macaroni boxes), looking at the sun shining on a parked car thru our glasses, or letting the sun shine thru binoculars onto a piece of paper. The eclipsed sun went from looking like a Pac-Man to a crescent.
As totality drew near between 2-2:34 p.m., our excitement grew as our environment changed. Everything became…ethereal. The light in the atmosphere around us grew dim with a surreal sheen that is hard to describe, but it was somewhat like a mix between dusk and the dim lighting caused by an approaching storm (except there was no storm). The air grew cooler and breezes picked up when there previously had been none. The horizon began to look like the sun was going to set! Crickets and katydids began to chirp as it grew darker. We positioned our chairs and bodies to view the valley below to see the umbra race across it (which we all missed) and to see the totally eclipsed sun (which we couldn’t take our eyes off of)! Minutes before totality, we all began to hear a humming sound. We looked around at each other wondering what it was and several of us said “bees!” There must have been bees swarming in their hive somewhere nearby – at first, we thought the swarming was coming from Tiffany’s bee box, but we later found out that there were no bees in the box. The swarming of bees was unexpected, and it was cool to have that unique to our experience of the eclipse. In minute or so before totality, we could all see the shadow bands from the moon on a white car parked next to us and on a white sheet that we had laid on the ground. Not everyone gets to witness shadow bands during an eclipse, but it was cool!
I wish I’d been prepared with my binoculars already around my neck when totality occurred at 3:34 p.m. because it went by so fast!! Just before totality, we saw the diamond ring effect (which we saw again at the end of totality and which I’ll explain momentarily)! We couldn’t help ourselves, but we all let out collective squeals, shouts, oohhs and aaahs as the moon totally eclipsed the sun. It was an experience that made me want to cry when it was all over because I didn’t want it to be over. (The only other thing more powerful than that ethereal experience that I have had was the dream I once had about Jesus returning and the Holy Spirit moving through the room I was in like a massive wave.) It was ethereal. Surreal. Beautiful. Outstanding. Amazing. Awe-inspiring. Heavenly. Exciting. The experience could not be fully captured with pictures, video, or even words. And it was not nearly long enough! Thinking about it makes me emotional...even more so that I may not ever see another total eclipse again! (We’ll probably try to see the one in 2024 as a family, but you never know if a storm cloud will cause you to miss it even if all else goes well!) And more emotions at the thought of how much more majesty and heavenly wonders we may witness in eternity with God!
I’ve seen a partial eclipse before and it is very cool but nothing compared to witnessing a total eclipse. I wish I’d had a telescope! We saw red prominences (eruptions from the sun) around the edges of the moon. We saw Mercury right next to the sun (which is rare to see because it is so close to the sun)! We saw the sun’s beautiful, indescribable corona (my favorite part) and I didn’t want to take my eyes off this gorgeous sight that our Creator orchestrated. Gazing at it through the binoculars was amazing and I wouldn’t have stopped except that we only had one pair and I wanted Tom to be able to view it through the binoculars too. To me, watching the corona and eclipsed sun was like hearing God’s voice and witnessing His Glory in a way I never had before…and I didn’t want it to end. Behold, the Glory of the Lord!
The instant in which totality ended as the moon moved away from the sun, we witnessed the amazing diamond ring effect as the first bright glow of sun peaked out from around the moon while the rest of the sun still appeared as a ring around the moon…effectively appearing like a diamond ring! I’ve never seen a more touching and yet heart-rending burst of light! It made me gasp in awe and wonder, and yet feel a great well of emotion – excitement and amazement mixed with much sadness because I knew it signaled the end of totality. As we all tried to collect ourselves and carry on about how amazing it was, the sun continued to slip back out from behind the moon, the light came back around us, the cool breezes left, the temperature rose, the bees stopped humming, and the crickets stopped chirping. Every now and then, we’d look skyward again with our glasses to watch the eclipse phasing back out. We weren’t nearly as attentive to the denouement of the eclipse because were too exhilarated by experiencing totality and saddened that it was over. Before the eclipse was entirely over, most from our group had left to go home. We started packing up our things to leave also, but I couldn’t help but run outside every now and then to see the eclipse phasing out while wishing I could see totality again.
We left Tiffany’s house at 6 p.m. for a 5-hour drive back home. Our 5-hour trip took 9 hours and we got home at 3 a.m.! Bumper to bumper, stop-and-go traffic almost the entire way back except for the last 40 minutes or so. We were exhausted, but the trip was most definitely worth it!
The next solar eclipse in North America will be on April 8, 2024. If you’ve never seen a total eclipse, I highly recommend that you try to see one! The next one will most likely be the last one many of us will have a chance to see in our lifetime.
Tuesday, September 12, 2017
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Don't Judge Me!
"For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account." - Hebrews 4:12-13
I read these verses last night during my quiet time with the Lord, and I encourage you to read these two verses again very carefully. I've broken it up by phrase below - pause after each phrase and let each one really sink in about what it's saying.
"For the word of God is
alive and active.
Sharper than any double-edged sword,
it penetrates
even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow;
it judges the
thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Nothing in all creation is hidden
from God's sight.
Everything is uncovered and laid bare
before the eyes
of him to whom we must give account."
- Hebrews 4:12-13
There is a trend going around of people saying "don't judge (me)," and for a while now, it has really bothered me whenever I hear a Christian say this. Usually folks using this phrase are doing so on the heels of doing or saying something that their conscience knows is at the very least questionable.
I think one of the reasons that this "don't judge me" trend bothers me is that it seems to be going hand-in-hand with the trend of "I can do/say whatever I want and everyone needs to be tolerant of it - I think God is fine with whatever I do because I'm a pretty good person. I don't think God cares whether I do this or that. I have a right to this or that. I'm being true to myself." Both of these trends were born among the lost and then little by little, spread into the Christian community. Many Christians are living lives that look no different than the lost world (been guilty here many times!) - so how are we supposed to be a light in the darkness? I'm curious about what our attitude toward God is when we embrace trends like these in our hearts. Any time someone has told me and embraced the things mentioned above, I've never heard them also talk about their relationship with God or quote Scripture to humbly show where they are trying to be obedient to God. Are we being humble toward God and His Righteousness? Or are we (finite humans, the creation) assuming how we think our infinite God and Creator thinks? Are we being so presumptuous as to tell God how we think He ought to do things?
If another Christian speaks the Word of God in your life and you find it convicting and uncomfortable, try considering that God is speaking to you using someone else to show you a passage in the Word that you perhaps haven't or won't read for yourself. Our first inclination is to distrust the person who is the messenger, think they are judging us or don't love us anymore (guilty here!), and oftentimes, we stop trying to pursue a relationship/friendship with that person. I'm not saying there aren't instances where some folks will abuse the Word of God to manipulate another person - I've experienced this in a terrible way before too, but we all have the capacity to recognize when someone truly loves us and wants God's best for us. It's unfortunate that we so often ignore the fact that a person really cares and loves us when our toes get stepped on.
My point is that it is often not a human being who is bringing conviction into our hearts, but rather, it is our Holy God who desires a close relationship with us and who cannot co-exist in the presence of sin. When someone is using mostly the Word of the Lord - Holy Scripture - when talking to you about something and you're starting to feel conviction or uncomfortable, then it is likely the Word of God trying to bring something to light in your heart that God wants to change in you.
As much as the prideful part of ourselves hates it, we cannot tell God "don't judge me." Yes, Jesus Christ preached love while He walked this Earth, but He was also quite confrontational to those who hardened their hearts, who refused to repent, and who decided that they knew the way to God better than God's own Son, Jesus Christ, whom they denied in their pride (the pharisees, for example).
Other men and women have no power or authority to bring spiritual conviction to your heart - only God has that authority, and He usually does so through His Word: "For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." However, God may use His Word through other vessels to convict our hearts if we are not actively reading the Word of God, not attending a Bible-preaching church (or hardening our hearts against the message if we go), nor exposing ourselves to the Living Word of God in any way. In these instances, God will often try to reach us in other ways because He loves us. One way such way is Him giving His Word to us through a friend or family member. If a loved one brings up Scriptures to talk to you about something that concerns them for you, that most likely doesn't mean that your loved one thinks that they're perfect or self-righteous, but it could mean that God is trying to convict your heart by giving wisdom to your loved one for your sake.
If we try to hide ourselves from others or make our "relationship with God" private/secret so that we don't have to be vulnerable to others, obedient to God, or face uncomfortable conviction, we would do well to remember that this is only a facade that we believe hides us. Adam and Eve hid from God after they sinned because they were suddenly aware of their sin, nakedness, and unrighteousness, but God still saw them.
Other men and women have no power or authority to bring spiritual conviction to your heart - only God has that authority, and He usually does so through His Word: "For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." However, God may use His Word through other vessels to convict our hearts if we are not actively reading the Word of God, not attending a Bible-preaching church (or hardening our hearts against the message if we go), nor exposing ourselves to the Living Word of God in any way. In these instances, God will often try to reach us in other ways because He loves us. One way such way is Him giving His Word to us through a friend or family member. If a loved one brings up Scriptures to talk to you about something that concerns them for you, that most likely doesn't mean that your loved one thinks that they're perfect or self-righteous, but it could mean that God is trying to convict your heart by giving wisdom to your loved one for your sake.
If we try to hide ourselves from others or make our "relationship with God" private/secret so that we don't have to be vulnerable to others, obedient to God, or face uncomfortable conviction, we would do well to remember that this is only a facade that we believe hides us. Adam and Eve hid from God after they sinned because they were suddenly aware of their sin, nakedness, and unrighteousness, but God still saw them.
"Nothing in all creation is hidden
from God's sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes
of him to whom we must give account."
Just as a child doesn't like having to apologize to his brother or sister for something, most folks dislike the word "repentance" because it means you have to step down from your pride and admit you were wrong. Sometimes you have to do this just between you and God, and sometimes you have to do this in front of or to someone else. Christian or non-Christian, whether or not we've tried to avoid "repentance" during our entire time of life on earth, we will all give an account to God one day - nothing is hidden from God. He desires our utmost love and devotion because He wants us to commune with him! If we have difficulty with turning our hearts in obedience to the Lord because of our shame and pride, there is still hope in salvation from the Lord and His abundant grace and mercy for those truly ask! Hebrews 4 ends with the hope we still have in Christ. :)
Just as a child doesn't like having to apologize to his brother or sister for something, most folks dislike the word "repentance" because it means you have to step down from your pride and admit you were wrong. Sometimes you have to do this just between you and God, and sometimes you have to do this in front of or to someone else. Christian or non-Christian, whether or not we've tried to avoid "repentance" during our entire time of life on earth, we will all give an account to God one day - nothing is hidden from God. He desires our utmost love and devotion because He wants us to commune with him! If we have difficulty with turning our hearts in obedience to the Lord because of our shame and pride, there is still hope in salvation from the Lord and His abundant grace and mercy for those truly ask! Hebrews 4 ends with the hope we still have in Christ. :)
"Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are -- yet, he did not sin. Let us then approach God's throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." - Hebrews 4:14-16
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
"Everyone's Got Something"
I plan to blog again soon about my butterfly once I can get the video edited together, but for now I just wanted to share something that has been on my heart lately. It's not often that I relate to secular songs, but another Christian who is very close to me and who knows what I've been going through lately recently shared this song with me saying "I thought you might relate to this song right now. They were right...this song is spot-on.
Before I share the song, I'd like to share what's been on my heart. I recently heard an audio sermon given by one of my former high school teachers - the theme of the sermon was "everyone's got something." And it's true. Everyone's got something that sticks out like a sore toe in their life - something that affects most areas of your life, for better or for worse. Something that you, specifically, struggle with or that has, for the time being, stumped you as to how to handle it. Perhaps it is something that you hold on to because you have too much fear over it to give it to God. It seems like the world is becoming an angrier and more hostile place to live in, especially if you're a Christian. So, it just follows that people are more stressed than before, under more pressure than before, and dealing with multiple "somethings" in their lives.
What's been on my heart is that because these things seem to be increasingly true, it also seems to become harder and harder for Christians to have grace with one another, much less try to understand someone else's "something" because their own "somethings" are so poignant and different from that of their fellow brother or sister in Christ. In other words, the pressure and hostility in the world is also weaving its way in between Christian brothers and sisters. It is usually difficult enough for a Christian to struggle through his or her something(s) without also having to struggle through pressure from his/her Christian brothers or sisters who don't act with grace or understanding toward him/her. (I'm speaking specifically of Christians who are striving to or actively seeking a constant, growing relationship with the Lord here.) It is expected that the world should act hostile toward Christians, but that is not what I'm talking about.
While I have been experiencing intense anxiety over some situations in my own life of this nature, I have also been feeling convicted of doing just the same - not acting with understanding and grace toward my Christian brothers and sisters. And if I can't act with grace toward my Christian brothers and sisters, then how am I supposed to illustrate God's grace toward non-Christians who have yet to even experience the grace of God? After talking with a dear Christian sister recently, our conversation reinforced this conviction in my heart. Thinking about this today brought to mind a poignant video called "God's Glasses" that brings tears to my eyes every time I watch it. What if we were all just a little more aware that everyone's got something?
God's Glasses from keephopealive on GodTube.
In the Linkin Park song "Numb," which someone recently shared with me, I like the line "Just Caught in the Undertow" because that is such a good image for how I've been feeling overwhelmed with the anxiety of the situations in my life. The song has a little "heavier" sound than most music I typically listen to, but the frustration you can hear in the singer's voice is spot-on as much as the lyrics. If you don't like the music style of the song, you can just read the lyrics below it.
"Numb"
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
[Chorus:]
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me,
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control?
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take.
[Chorus:]
And I know
I may end up failing too.
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.
[Chorus:]
* * * * * * * * *
In spite of the difficulty I've had with such situations lately, I don't want to miss what the Lord is trying to teach me through it. I'm sure I've made someone else feel this way before as much as I've been feeling this way lately, so I return my thoughts to Jesus Christ and the grace He extended to me. I return my thoughts to "How can I be just a little more aware that everyone's got something?"
Before I share the song, I'd like to share what's been on my heart. I recently heard an audio sermon given by one of my former high school teachers - the theme of the sermon was "everyone's got something." And it's true. Everyone's got something that sticks out like a sore toe in their life - something that affects most areas of your life, for better or for worse. Something that you, specifically, struggle with or that has, for the time being, stumped you as to how to handle it. Perhaps it is something that you hold on to because you have too much fear over it to give it to God. It seems like the world is becoming an angrier and more hostile place to live in, especially if you're a Christian. So, it just follows that people are more stressed than before, under more pressure than before, and dealing with multiple "somethings" in their lives.
What's been on my heart is that because these things seem to be increasingly true, it also seems to become harder and harder for Christians to have grace with one another, much less try to understand someone else's "something" because their own "somethings" are so poignant and different from that of their fellow brother or sister in Christ. In other words, the pressure and hostility in the world is also weaving its way in between Christian brothers and sisters. It is usually difficult enough for a Christian to struggle through his or her something(s) without also having to struggle through pressure from his/her Christian brothers or sisters who don't act with grace or understanding toward him/her. (I'm speaking specifically of Christians who are striving to or actively seeking a constant, growing relationship with the Lord here.) It is expected that the world should act hostile toward Christians, but that is not what I'm talking about.
While I have been experiencing intense anxiety over some situations in my own life of this nature, I have also been feeling convicted of doing just the same - not acting with understanding and grace toward my Christian brothers and sisters. And if I can't act with grace toward my Christian brothers and sisters, then how am I supposed to illustrate God's grace toward non-Christians who have yet to even experience the grace of God? After talking with a dear Christian sister recently, our conversation reinforced this conviction in my heart. Thinking about this today brought to mind a poignant video called "God's Glasses" that brings tears to my eyes every time I watch it. What if we were all just a little more aware that everyone's got something?
God's Glasses from keephopealive on GodTube.
In the Linkin Park song "Numb," which someone recently shared with me, I like the line "Just Caught in the Undertow" because that is such a good image for how I've been feeling overwhelmed with the anxiety of the situations in my life. The song has a little "heavier" sound than most music I typically listen to, but the frustration you can hear in the singer's voice is spot-on as much as the lyrics. If you don't like the music style of the song, you can just read the lyrics below it.
"Numb"
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
[Chorus:]
I've become so numb, I can't feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
I'm becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me,
Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control?
'Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you.
(Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take.
[Chorus:]
And I know
I may end up failing too.
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you.
[Chorus:]
* * * * * * * * *
In spite of the difficulty I've had with such situations lately, I don't want to miss what the Lord is trying to teach me through it. I'm sure I've made someone else feel this way before as much as I've been feeling this way lately, so I return my thoughts to Jesus Christ and the grace He extended to me. I return my thoughts to "How can I be just a little more aware that everyone's got something?"
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Love Inside a Chrysalis
Once again, it's been so long since I've written that now I have more to blog about than I have time for! I've been itching to blog again for a while, but then when I finally sit down to write, I stare at the screen and wonder where I start! Ha!
Let's start on a mildly cool morning when a blanket of fog settles low to the ground while vibrantly bright fall colors peek over the top of the foggy blanket. A gentle, blue sky feathered with whisps of white clouds give a perfect backdrop to the vivid color of the leaves on the trees, promising a pleasantly warm day to break the cycle of cold ones. This precisely describes my drive to work this morning. It was a serenely quiet morning while passing the crop fields and uneventful pastures where cows and donkeys grazed and looking out toward the distant stretch of the Blue Ridge Mountains...the symbol of my home. It was a peaceful morning as I temporarily set aside all anxious thoughts, nestling into the presence of the Lord, being encouraged by the faithful morning radio show on Spirit FM, and excitedly anticipating the joy of a new delight from my Lord: the emergence of a monarch butterfly from my chrysalis!
On the morning of Tom's and my 5th anniversary, October 18, 2013, a monarch caterpillar formed its chrysalis to begin a remarkable transformation. My sister Tiffany surprised me with the chrysalis for my birthday when we saw her the next day. I can't think of proper words to describe the flood of emotions I felt when she gave it to me, but it was overwhelming. There went my sensitivity again! A wise man recently told me that I am "sensitive," and that I need to embrace that about myself so that God can use it for His Glory! Working on it. :)
When I saw the chrysalis, I do remember feeling my heart surge in my chest! I just about wept for joy at its beauty and knowing what a perfectly designed and delicate life was inside. How AWESOME God is! Oh, how He knows what delights my heart and how He continues to bless me with such things!
When I came home from work yesterday, I noticed significant changes to inside the semi-translucent chrysalis and excitedly called my sister. Now, almost 13 days after it formed its chrysalis, it should emerge any time now! My sister suspects it will be Wednesday morning! That's tomorrow...or, later today, I should say since it is after midnight! She taught me how to tell
if it's a male or female, how to tag it, what to feed it, and how to hold it once it
emerges. The fine detail and intricacies of such life illustrate not
only that God is so clearly the Author of Creation but that He delights
in me through His Creation!
And now, my heart is overwhelmed once more with emotions as I wait anxiously for a beautiful monarch butterfly to emerge from this beautiful chrysalis that I have so lovingly watched for 12 days. I'm overwhelmed because I'm excited to see the monarch butterfly emerge and hold and feed it, sad that it will need to leave to start its long trip to Mexico, worried that it might not make it all the way there, and overjoyed at having the opportunity to witness something so unique and special!
I took my chrysalis to work today to keep an eye on it since it was possible that it could have emerged today. I was grateful for the opportunity to share it with some of my coworkers - this is too beautiful of a transformation to not share it with others! I got a nice laugh when a couple of folks
asked me if I had decorated the chrysalis and after a moment of being baffled by their question, I said, "No, God did!" :) I mean, look at it! This thing has GOLD on it! :) It's as if God signed His name with love on the chrysalis and inside the chrysalis, it's as if He left His promises and the hope and love that are in Him in which we can be secure.
One of my coworkers was having a difficult day for health reasons and seemed genuinely grateful that she was able to share in the excitement of the chrysalis - it cheered her up a bit - and this, too, overwhelmed me with emotion as I realized God was delighting her heart with it too. :)
"For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse." -Romans 1:20. Psalm 139 is one of my favorite Psalms and always reminds me just how intimately the Lord knows us and how great is His love for us...how much richer are our lives when we seek His face!
I hope to blog again soon (hopefully tomorrow) about some of the other things on my heart, but this is part 1. :) God bless you and good night!
Let's start on a mildly cool morning when a blanket of fog settles low to the ground while vibrantly bright fall colors peek over the top of the foggy blanket. A gentle, blue sky feathered with whisps of white clouds give a perfect backdrop to the vivid color of the leaves on the trees, promising a pleasantly warm day to break the cycle of cold ones. This precisely describes my drive to work this morning. It was a serenely quiet morning while passing the crop fields and uneventful pastures where cows and donkeys grazed and looking out toward the distant stretch of the Blue Ridge Mountains...the symbol of my home. It was a peaceful morning as I temporarily set aside all anxious thoughts, nestling into the presence of the Lord, being encouraged by the faithful morning radio show on Spirit FM, and excitedly anticipating the joy of a new delight from my Lord: the emergence of a monarch butterfly from my chrysalis!
 |
| Day 5 after it formed a chrysalis |
On the morning of Tom's and my 5th anniversary, October 18, 2013, a monarch caterpillar formed its chrysalis to begin a remarkable transformation. My sister Tiffany surprised me with the chrysalis for my birthday when we saw her the next day. I can't think of proper words to describe the flood of emotions I felt when she gave it to me, but it was overwhelming. There went my sensitivity again! A wise man recently told me that I am "sensitive," and that I need to embrace that about myself so that God can use it for His Glory! Working on it. :)
 |
| Day 5 |
 |
| Day 11 after it formed a chrysalis - see the changes!? :) |
 |
| Day 11 |
And now, my heart is overwhelmed once more with emotions as I wait anxiously for a beautiful monarch butterfly to emerge from this beautiful chrysalis that I have so lovingly watched for 12 days. I'm overwhelmed because I'm excited to see the monarch butterfly emerge and hold and feed it, sad that it will need to leave to start its long trip to Mexico, worried that it might not make it all the way there, and overjoyed at having the opportunity to witness something so unique and special!
I took my chrysalis to work today to keep an eye on it since it was possible that it could have emerged today. I was grateful for the opportunity to share it with some of my coworkers - this is too beautiful of a transformation to not share it with others! I got a nice laugh when a couple of folks
asked me if I had decorated the chrysalis and after a moment of being baffled by their question, I said, "No, God did!" :) I mean, look at it! This thing has GOLD on it! :) It's as if God signed His name with love on the chrysalis and inside the chrysalis, it's as if He left His promises and the hope and love that are in Him in which we can be secure. One of my coworkers was having a difficult day for health reasons and seemed genuinely grateful that she was able to share in the excitement of the chrysalis - it cheered her up a bit - and this, too, overwhelmed me with emotion as I realized God was delighting her heart with it too. :)
"For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse." -Romans 1:20. Psalm 139 is one of my favorite Psalms and always reminds me just how intimately the Lord knows us and how great is His love for us...how much richer are our lives when we seek His face!
I hope to blog again soon (hopefully tomorrow) about some of the other things on my heart, but this is part 1. :) God bless you and good night!
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
New Weight Loss Program? Uh oh...
Today, I downloaded a new free app on my phone called Noom that helps you log your exercise and meals/food intake to help you lose weight. I set up my profile and went through a mini-tutorial to get started. I set my weight loss goal even though it's still a little above where I'm probably supposed to be for my height.
Day 1
Based on my weight loss goal, I'm supposed to eat no more than 1200 calories per day. I ate more than that at lunchtime alone! Well, I should say lunch plus a mid-afternoon snack. Breakfast, I did well. Dinner - mediocre to poor. Lunch = horrible! My exercise amount took a lot of my tiny bit of free time today, but I almost met my supposed exercise quota amount for the day.
I've been having a lot of anxiety attacks - lately lasting pretty much all day, but thought maybe more exercise and following a proper weight loss regimen would help. Maybe this wasn't something I should start when I feel so overwhelmed? I find it very time-consuming and confusing to figure out the calories in every little thing I eat, but I know that's what needs to happen in order to get a handle on losing weight. Feeling very discouraged. Noom tries to encourage you, but I'm at a total loss of what to do next.
We've already bought groceries for the week, so I can't go buy a bunch of new groceries. I barely cook (I enjoy baking, but that won't help me here), so that makes things more challenging. I never feel like my lunches are very exciting...I often get pretty bored with them (ever happened to you??)...so what should I put in my lunches?
I'll be turning 30 in a couple of months, which I know means that my metabolism is slowing down even more. I learned from one health & wellness speaker that your metabolism slows down a certain percentage every 10 years, so the older you get, the more important it is to continue resistance exercises - some of these are feasible for me to do with a bad back and some are not, but I do my best.
Based on Day 1, it looks like lunches are my biggest problem - definitely would not have guessed that! As discouraged as I feel, I guess it's a lesson learned. I'm sure dinners could stand some tweaking here and there, but for now, perhaps I should tackle the lunch problem. Part of my difficulty is not having/giving myself enough time to prepare lunches, so I make a sandwich and grab several other items to throw in there to eat during the day - yogurt, 100 calorie packs of wafers and/or cheese crackers, a baggie of grapes (usually), sometimes a Luna bar, etc. Sometimes I only eat 3 items along with my sandwich, sometimes 4. Any suggestions on an inexpensive way to have easy-to-grab-and-go lunches?
My desire is not to make this weight loss thing an idol in my life, but to use it as a tool to help me be a better steward of the body God gave me. I believe that what I eat and how much I eat contributes a great deal to my overall health and well-being. If I can stick with it, I think the Lord has much to teach me about patience, self-control, willpower, and most importantly, relying on Him.
Day 1
Based on my weight loss goal, I'm supposed to eat no more than 1200 calories per day. I ate more than that at lunchtime alone! Well, I should say lunch plus a mid-afternoon snack. Breakfast, I did well. Dinner - mediocre to poor. Lunch = horrible! My exercise amount took a lot of my tiny bit of free time today, but I almost met my supposed exercise quota amount for the day.
I've been having a lot of anxiety attacks - lately lasting pretty much all day, but thought maybe more exercise and following a proper weight loss regimen would help. Maybe this wasn't something I should start when I feel so overwhelmed? I find it very time-consuming and confusing to figure out the calories in every little thing I eat, but I know that's what needs to happen in order to get a handle on losing weight. Feeling very discouraged. Noom tries to encourage you, but I'm at a total loss of what to do next.
We've already bought groceries for the week, so I can't go buy a bunch of new groceries. I barely cook (I enjoy baking, but that won't help me here), so that makes things more challenging. I never feel like my lunches are very exciting...I often get pretty bored with them (ever happened to you??)...so what should I put in my lunches?
I'll be turning 30 in a couple of months, which I know means that my metabolism is slowing down even more. I learned from one health & wellness speaker that your metabolism slows down a certain percentage every 10 years, so the older you get, the more important it is to continue resistance exercises - some of these are feasible for me to do with a bad back and some are not, but I do my best.
Based on Day 1, it looks like lunches are my biggest problem - definitely would not have guessed that! As discouraged as I feel, I guess it's a lesson learned. I'm sure dinners could stand some tweaking here and there, but for now, perhaps I should tackle the lunch problem. Part of my difficulty is not having/giving myself enough time to prepare lunches, so I make a sandwich and grab several other items to throw in there to eat during the day - yogurt, 100 calorie packs of wafers and/or cheese crackers, a baggie of grapes (usually), sometimes a Luna bar, etc. Sometimes I only eat 3 items along with my sandwich, sometimes 4. Any suggestions on an inexpensive way to have easy-to-grab-and-go lunches?
My desire is not to make this weight loss thing an idol in my life, but to use it as a tool to help me be a better steward of the body God gave me. I believe that what I eat and how much I eat contributes a great deal to my overall health and well-being. If I can stick with it, I think the Lord has much to teach me about patience, self-control, willpower, and most importantly, relying on Him.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Frisbee Golf Fail
 |
| The Mushroom: blurry because my camera lens fogged up from humidity as soon as I opened it! |
We thought we'd tough out the intense humidity, poison ivy (Tom and both the dogs accidentally touched some), mosquitoes, and a lot of mud, so we kind-of made it through baskets 1 & 2. On our way to the 3rd basket (walking down a slippery, muddy path in a thick part of the woods), I stopped to take a picture of a mushroom (I like fungi) while Tom and the puppies got quite a bit farther ahead of me.
Just as I stood back up from taking the picture, a loud gun crack split the air so loudly that it sounded like it was only a few yards from me! I looked down at my clothes to see that I was wearing dark blue shorts and a dark green shirt...not good! I hollered out to Tom to make sure he was okay even as I acknowledged that I had not been shot. He hollered back to see if I was alright and made his way back up the trail to me. He wasn't wearing any bright colors either, and of course our dogs are black and brown. We were in a state park, so we definitely weren't expecting to hear gun shots from what we figured were hunters. Nevertheless, knowing that it wouldn't be the first time a hunter has shot at something before making sure it WASN'T a human, we finally decided that frisbee golf just wasn't in the cards for today!
Thanking the Lord for keeping us safe! :)
(We still had fun together anyway!)
Post-disclaimer: this is not a story to call for anti-gun laws or to say that all hunters are irresponsible (they're not).
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Through the Eyes of a Creative Writer
Have you ever imagined living in or seeing 3 realities (or worlds) at the same time? It dawned on me yesterday evening that most days, I do exactly this. I see at least three realities around me almost every day (I say almost because I cannot count the days in which I'm so tired or sick that I can't focus on much more than simply getting more rest). The fact that my brain does this fascinates me because I realize that it makes life seem much richer at any given moment if I merely pause to appreciate it, but it also fascinates me because I realize that the majority of people see only one or two of these "realities" or "worlds." And on top of this, as my counselor has explained to me, I see the world in "high definition"...which, in turn, means I can potentially see all 3 worlds in high-definition! It's so crazy to me...but awesome!
Small Tangent off-topic ("rabbit trail"): I'm always afraid that people will think I'm boasting or trying to puff myself up (see previous blog post about my fear of what others think and their approval of me), but I certainly don't intend any of this to come across that way. When I discover something about myself or about what the Lord is teaching me, I want to share it with others for two reasons: first and foremost, I want to share what the Lord is teaching me in case it might help someone else! Secondly, because I, like most folks, want to be known (that is to say, I want to be understood). For me, I find it easier to express myself in writing. :) I believe the desire to be known (understood) comes directly from being made in the image of our Creator, who desires most strongly to be known and understood by us! Our life is about our relationship with Him and our relationships with others. << end tangent >>
The three "worlds" to which I'm referring are as follows:
1. The real, actual world (actual physical reality - visible, tangible, factual), which most people see, but which I apparently see in "high definition."
2. The spiritual world all around us (actual spiritual reality, but invisible, not always tangible, still factual), which only some people see and understand if they are walking in a close relationship with the Lord. Seeing this world is in direct correlation to your relationship to God - He permits you to see as much as He knows you are prepared to see. I see this world so long as I am seeking the Lord through His Word and prayer and fellowship with other Christians. I start losing sight of this world any time I start focusing on myself or things other than God. The closer I walk with the Lord, the more "high definition" I can see in this world, but only as much as the Lord permits me to see. I'm glad He keeps some things hidden because I know we wouldn't be able to handle it if we could see and understand everything that He does.
3. The fictional world (not physical reality, but many other "possible" realities with visual and tangible elements that temporarily seem real), which most people don't see but which my mind usually sees with as much clarity as the real world when I choose to turn this "lens" on. When I have this lens on, new things appear and real things become what they are not - sometimes changing shape, taking on more shape, becoming exaggerated, or developing a story that they didn't once have. Because this world is the "odd ball out" for most folks, it's the one I want to try to describe to you here.
When I turn the "fictional world" lens on in my mind, the real world through my eyes is much more than normal reality with some occasional daydreaming! To use some cultural references: how I see the world is like how J.M. Barrie sees the world in the movie Finding Neverland, or like how Edward Bloom does in the movie Big Fish. There are many other movie media examples for this, but these are two of my favorites. If you haven't seen these movies, I recommend them! :)
As you can somewhat tell in the trailer above for the movie Finding Neverland, J.M.Barrie sees things with his imagination as if they are really there even though they are not. Ultimately, I think that's what makes a great fiction writer - the ability to fully believe in (even if temporarily) a fictional world around you in so much detail and intensity that you can recreate the world with words so that others may join you there (again, temporarily). That is why I love creative writing; that is why I want to write for the entertainment of others (though I need much practice) -- because like most writers, I want to perfectly describe the fictional worlds that I see so that others can experience them too through reading even if they don't experience it during their every day life like I do. I want others to be a part of it! My dilemma: finishing my stories! :)
Life seems richer or more colorful when you not only see actual reality, but you also see a dozen possibilities! Here are a couple of examples of what I mean by "life is richer." My husband and I like to go hiking and that has been one of our favorite activities since we started dating. During the time we have been married, we have also gone hiking with my sister Tiffany, who is a wildlife biologist, ornithologist (studies birds), and an environmental educator in the Smoky Mountains. She has taught us how to identify flowers, trees, birds and bird songs, lichen, salamanders, and many other things. We're still beginners compared to her, but now when we hike by ourselves, our experience is so much richer because we have a greater knowledge and better understanding of the natural beauty around us!
My husband tells me that he's read about how people in some other places in the world have more specific words to label more specific shades of color, so people in those parts of the world are actually able to see more color, or color on a whole new level, than we are! Likewise, musicians are able to hear all the nuances and each specific melody, harmony and part of a piece of music or song that makes the music seem much richer to them than to the non-musician who just hears the song as a whole. More in-depth knowledge adds a new "flavor," so to speak, to life. (More knowledge can also, by the by, add more sorrow to life.)
It is similar when experiencing the fictional world at the same time as the real world and spiritual world. Seeing new things that don't actually exist or seeing new fictional possibilities with things in the real world adds a new "flavor" and depth to life. Because I love nature so much, many of the things I see in the fictional world often involve nature somehow. Here's a small glimpse of ways my mind sees a fictional world in addition to the real world:
A simple doorway becomes an arbor, a secret tunnel, or a grand double-door entryway. Two intertwined trees become lovers embraced forever. The creaking of the cafeteria table at my elementary school becomes an entire hidden factory of miniature creatures who are hard at work on little machines. A restful nap in my hammock in my backyard becomes a gentle swing on a high mountain cliff overlooking a gorgeous valley. An ocean wave becomes a little hungry sea monster begging for "sand patties." A songbird becomes a character in a great adventure! Every 10th stranger, on average, becomes the inspiration for a new story character. The scent of fresh-baked treats permeates into an opening line of a story. An abstract pattern in my shower curtain becomes a new fictional creature to make appearances in my stories. The opening animated company logo at the beginning of a film comes to life and becomes another new fictional world in my mind. The wind blowing through the trees becomes the trees laughing, whispering, or clapping.
Those are just some examples of how real things become fictional things in the fictional world that my mind sees; this doesn't account for the many new things that I create at random to fill the fictional world. The other part that fascinates me is that not a single thought or made-up thing is my own -- the original thought had to have come from God first, or at least, the components of real things which came from God are combined in just such a way (which God also thought of first) that it becomes a fictional thing that God must place at my fingertips to discover and use creatively. Why would He create me this way? Other than to delight in me, which He so loves to do, and particularly to use toward His glory, I'm not sure of other reasons. Even of these two reasons, I have much to ponder about.
I hope that some of this made sense to you and was at least somewhat interesting! I wanted to at least try to describe it in a blog post, but if I can ever finish all the stories I start, it might turn out better and more interesting for you if I just shared some parts of the fictional world I see through stories. :) Since I sometimes feel a little like Edward Bloom from the movie Big Fish, I'll leave you with a glimpse of the film from the movie trailer.
Small Tangent off-topic ("rabbit trail"): I'm always afraid that people will think I'm boasting or trying to puff myself up (see previous blog post about my fear of what others think and their approval of me), but I certainly don't intend any of this to come across that way. When I discover something about myself or about what the Lord is teaching me, I want to share it with others for two reasons: first and foremost, I want to share what the Lord is teaching me in case it might help someone else! Secondly, because I, like most folks, want to be known (that is to say, I want to be understood). For me, I find it easier to express myself in writing. :) I believe the desire to be known (understood) comes directly from being made in the image of our Creator, who desires most strongly to be known and understood by us! Our life is about our relationship with Him and our relationships with others. << end tangent >>
The three "worlds" to which I'm referring are as follows:
1. The real, actual world (actual physical reality - visible, tangible, factual), which most people see, but which I apparently see in "high definition."
2. The spiritual world all around us (actual spiritual reality, but invisible, not always tangible, still factual), which only some people see and understand if they are walking in a close relationship with the Lord. Seeing this world is in direct correlation to your relationship to God - He permits you to see as much as He knows you are prepared to see. I see this world so long as I am seeking the Lord through His Word and prayer and fellowship with other Christians. I start losing sight of this world any time I start focusing on myself or things other than God. The closer I walk with the Lord, the more "high definition" I can see in this world, but only as much as the Lord permits me to see. I'm glad He keeps some things hidden because I know we wouldn't be able to handle it if we could see and understand everything that He does.
3. The fictional world (not physical reality, but many other "possible" realities with visual and tangible elements that temporarily seem real), which most people don't see but which my mind usually sees with as much clarity as the real world when I choose to turn this "lens" on. When I have this lens on, new things appear and real things become what they are not - sometimes changing shape, taking on more shape, becoming exaggerated, or developing a story that they didn't once have. Because this world is the "odd ball out" for most folks, it's the one I want to try to describe to you here.
When I turn the "fictional world" lens on in my mind, the real world through my eyes is much more than normal reality with some occasional daydreaming! To use some cultural references: how I see the world is like how J.M. Barrie sees the world in the movie Finding Neverland, or like how Edward Bloom does in the movie Big Fish. There are many other movie media examples for this, but these are two of my favorites. If you haven't seen these movies, I recommend them! :)
As you can somewhat tell in the trailer above for the movie Finding Neverland, J.M.Barrie sees things with his imagination as if they are really there even though they are not. Ultimately, I think that's what makes a great fiction writer - the ability to fully believe in (even if temporarily) a fictional world around you in so much detail and intensity that you can recreate the world with words so that others may join you there (again, temporarily). That is why I love creative writing; that is why I want to write for the entertainment of others (though I need much practice) -- because like most writers, I want to perfectly describe the fictional worlds that I see so that others can experience them too through reading even if they don't experience it during their every day life like I do. I want others to be a part of it! My dilemma: finishing my stories! :)
Life seems richer or more colorful when you not only see actual reality, but you also see a dozen possibilities! Here are a couple of examples of what I mean by "life is richer." My husband and I like to go hiking and that has been one of our favorite activities since we started dating. During the time we have been married, we have also gone hiking with my sister Tiffany, who is a wildlife biologist, ornithologist (studies birds), and an environmental educator in the Smoky Mountains. She has taught us how to identify flowers, trees, birds and bird songs, lichen, salamanders, and many other things. We're still beginners compared to her, but now when we hike by ourselves, our experience is so much richer because we have a greater knowledge and better understanding of the natural beauty around us!
My husband tells me that he's read about how people in some other places in the world have more specific words to label more specific shades of color, so people in those parts of the world are actually able to see more color, or color on a whole new level, than we are! Likewise, musicians are able to hear all the nuances and each specific melody, harmony and part of a piece of music or song that makes the music seem much richer to them than to the non-musician who just hears the song as a whole. More in-depth knowledge adds a new "flavor," so to speak, to life. (More knowledge can also, by the by, add more sorrow to life.)
It is similar when experiencing the fictional world at the same time as the real world and spiritual world. Seeing new things that don't actually exist or seeing new fictional possibilities with things in the real world adds a new "flavor" and depth to life. Because I love nature so much, many of the things I see in the fictional world often involve nature somehow. Here's a small glimpse of ways my mind sees a fictional world in addition to the real world:
A simple doorway becomes an arbor, a secret tunnel, or a grand double-door entryway. Two intertwined trees become lovers embraced forever. The creaking of the cafeteria table at my elementary school becomes an entire hidden factory of miniature creatures who are hard at work on little machines. A restful nap in my hammock in my backyard becomes a gentle swing on a high mountain cliff overlooking a gorgeous valley. An ocean wave becomes a little hungry sea monster begging for "sand patties." A songbird becomes a character in a great adventure! Every 10th stranger, on average, becomes the inspiration for a new story character. The scent of fresh-baked treats permeates into an opening line of a story. An abstract pattern in my shower curtain becomes a new fictional creature to make appearances in my stories. The opening animated company logo at the beginning of a film comes to life and becomes another new fictional world in my mind. The wind blowing through the trees becomes the trees laughing, whispering, or clapping.
Those are just some examples of how real things become fictional things in the fictional world that my mind sees; this doesn't account for the many new things that I create at random to fill the fictional world. The other part that fascinates me is that not a single thought or made-up thing is my own -- the original thought had to have come from God first, or at least, the components of real things which came from God are combined in just such a way (which God also thought of first) that it becomes a fictional thing that God must place at my fingertips to discover and use creatively. Why would He create me this way? Other than to delight in me, which He so loves to do, and particularly to use toward His glory, I'm not sure of other reasons. Even of these two reasons, I have much to ponder about.
I hope that some of this made sense to you and was at least somewhat interesting! I wanted to at least try to describe it in a blog post, but if I can ever finish all the stories I start, it might turn out better and more interesting for you if I just shared some parts of the fictional world I see through stories. :) Since I sometimes feel a little like Edward Bloom from the movie Big Fish, I'll leave you with a glimpse of the film from the movie trailer.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)